Landon is 2 Months Old

I am still in awe of this silly, smilely, laughing little boy.
   Love :)

Family Friday Week 3 Brotherly Love

Steve and Biddie.
  June 1970.

Go Ahead, Make My Day

I had an appointment with my doctor today and I met a very sweet girl in the waiting room.

 She thought that I was 26 and I was (obviously) way too young to be a grandma.

 Also, she liked my hair, which I not only washed but also brushed today.


Hey, it's my story and I can tell it the way that I want to :)

Ch-Changes

Life can be strange.

Just when you think things are one way, something happens to pull the rug out from under you.

KC has moved out again and I am no longer considered eligible for disability.

 Ain't that a kicker?





I have sent out some invites to a new blog. If I missed you on the invitation list, let me know and I will make sure that you can visit me at my new place. I will sort things out there. (Click on the post title to be redircted if you are singed in)

Family Friday - Week Two

This lovely lady with the big smile is my grandmother, who will be 90 in 2 short months. She travelled to Kayla's baby shower all the way from the Windsor area to be at the shower.

 I think it is amazing that I, as a granmother, still have MY grandmother. How lucky am I?

You have to wonder about someone that is so obsessed with another person that they just can not let them go. Someone that is so hung up on an ex that they must follow that person's every move, find ways to insert themselves into the lives of the very person (people) that they profess to detest.

 I have one of these followers. He is (in my opinion) insane. Ok, maybe not clinically insane, but off kilter at the very least.

   All I can  hope is that this nut bar finds a new hobby, or better yet, he is finally called out for his bizarre and malicious behaviour.

  Your time is coming, Goof Boots.

 

I am still working on my relationship with my Mum, and most days I feel as though we are communicating the way that I have always wanted to. It has been a long time since we have spent any real time together and it has been more than 20 years since I have I gone back to Nova Scotia, the place that I consider to be my home.

   I may regret this, and I may change my mind, heck, I may not be able to afford it, but my plan is to see the ocean this summer.

  Yup, watch out Halifax, here I come!

My Laughing Boy

This is what/who gets me up everyday. My Kayla, and my laughing boy. I am going through some stuff that is reallly affecting my mental healthand I don't know how to cope. I long talk with my Mum helped, a bit. An email from my brother may have helped to clear things up, but closer to home, things are for the birds.

I don't know what I am going to do to make things better. I don't know how I will cope.

  I will be around.......

Introducing

..............Family Friday.

Ok, maybe the name is lame, but I like the concept. Fridays will be all about family and this week I am starting with

Landon Matthew, of course. This is one of my new favourite photos of him. He is snuggled in his Mommy's baby blanket, which belonged to KC first. This blanket has been loved.

This photo takes me back 20 years to when his momma was just about this size.

So there you have Family Friday Week One:

Landon and the baby blanket.

I think that I am going to like Fridays :)

Worst motel EVER.

Happy New Year. 2011

There are mere hours left until we start a new year - a new decade - and I am actually looking forward to a new year rather than facing it with dread.
I can remember New Year's Eve as we bid farewell to the 70's. My brother, his bff, a bottle of coke and Dick Clark. I had no idea that the new decade would bring so many changes and heart break. I was 11 years old and thought that life was all unicorns and lollipops.
I can recall heading into the 90's (with husband #1) and the new millennium (with #2).
This year, maybe because I am with husband #3 (third time is the charm) or because I have a brand spanking new adorable grandson, I am feeling remarkably positive about this new decade.
Who am I fooling? It is probably the meds :)
Whatever the case, I am spending time with my family tonight and then having a buffet dinner with more loved ones tomorrow. I can't think of a better way to start the new year.

Happy New Year, friends. See you in 2011!

New Year, New Resolutions

I try not make New Year's Resolutions, because, honestly, I never stick with them. Oh you know, the first day, or maybe even week, I do my best to follow my self imposed new rules. Eventually, since they are self imposed, I usually decide to break my own rules and give up.
This year, I am only making one - to get back into the blog world and start writing again.
It doesn't have to be epic, it just has to be me writing my thoughts, my dreams, about my dull ass life, whatever.
Writing is something that doesn't come easily to me anymore. I am not sure if it is the racing thoughts that come with my bi polar/anxiety mood disorder, or the meds that I take for the disorder. Damned if I do, damned if I don't.
Still, I need to write. The words, thoughts, the urge, is a part of me that I need to acknowledge. So, 2011 will see more of me, my moods, my kids, grandkid, my life in general. I hope that my old friends will be back and I will make some new ones along the way. Christmas Day, Cody, Kayla and Landon. The new family.

Lola, playing in the wrapping paper. Even the pets had a good Christmas.

I LOVE this! I found this Sesame Street Play'n Go Rider. It was brand new, in the box, circa 1986. It will be a little while before Landon can actually ride it, but I can admire it in the meantime.

Christmas was incredible. I don't know if there is anything better (for me) then spending time with my family, eating, laughing, and enjoying each others' company. Maybe that will be my second New Year's Resolution. More time spent with family. That one should be easy enough to keep :)

Happy Birthday, Sweet 16

Happy Birthday, Jessica Lynn. How serendipitous that you are turning 16 on the 16th of December. This is going to be a great year for you, I just know it.

You have brought my life moments of profound joy and uncountable hours of laughter, amazement, and sheer happiness. Your birth enriched the lives of many people, more than you may know.

I have loved you since the day that you were no more than a thought. I have seen you struggle with your health and other issues and you have never complained. I am proud beyond words and my love is deeper than the vastest oceans and seas.

You are my Molly Dolly, my Jesser, my Noodle.

Happy Birthday, my sweet 16.

dear asshats

Dear Stalker-Hacker-Asshat:
You have been hacking into my accounts and using my name for years now. It will not stop me from blogging, speaking my mind, and being the real Bridget Steeves (Allen) Biddie(girl).
There are many other pastimes that you might enjoy equally as much..With your stunning intellect, I suggest starting with something simple - like counting your fingers and watching the Tree House channel.
Mind your own business, take care of your own kids, worry about your own life and stay out of mine.
Thank you-
Biddie

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc0mxOXbWIU

I know that I am a Nana now, but I can't help loving this song.

This is what has been happening in my life the past (almost) 2 weeks. This little guy with the messy head has stolen my heart.
He is the spitting image of his mom, yet he looks like his dad, too. He also resembles my Dad - not in a Benjamin Button way - but rather he looks like my father did when he was young.
Landon (or Lando, as I call him) changed my world. He has changed the world of many people, I suspect. He brought joy to Shawn's mom on Sunday when he was the guest of honour at Oma's birthday party.
Seriously, it was like a celebrity was in the house. He is slowly making friends with his cousin Ryder, who at a year and a half, is not quite ready to pass the 'baby' torch. At one point, Ryder was showing everyone his finger, where Landon had bitten him in an unprovoked attack.
Kayla is doing an imcredible job as mommy. I am so proud of her.

There is more to my life than just Landon, though.

Jessica turns 16 on the 16 th. She does not want a party, or any kind of fuss. I still haven't decided what to get her, and her big day is quickly approaching.
Christmas is just around the corner too and *gasp* my village is nowhere to be seen. It is still in the basement, gathering dust.

This Nana gig takes more time then I ever thought that it would, but I am loving every minute of it!

Life in Photos, Wednesday, November 24

Meet my grandson, Landon, and his mom and dad. He is about one hour old here.

You can still see the marks from the forceps, but otherwise? Perfect!

Landon meeting his great grandma Lynn.

Mommy and Baby. What could be more beautiful.

Sunday, In Photos.

This is my Kayla on November 21 st, at her babyshower. She is uncomfortable, and tired, and in this photo, overwhelmed and overheated. She still looks great to me. This is the million dollar cake that we bought to feed the guests and welcome our newest family memeber. He will be here soon, I just know it.

This beautiful lady is my grandmother, Kayla`s great grandmother, Landon`s great, GREAT grandmother. She travelled 3 hours to be here with us.

It was a crazy, busy, funtastic day. Now, it feels really real!

The Final Countdown.

I can hardly believe that I have about 4 weeks until the wee one arrives. I look back on the past few months with awe. At times the days passed soo slowly, and yet suddenly, here we are, just a few weeks shy of Landon's arrival.
Kayla has been feeling fine - well, if fine is huge and tired - and is so ready to hold her little one tight.
This child has been the catalyst for so much change and he is not even here yet. I credit Landon for giving me the strength to call my Mum and tell her that she was going to be a great grandma. We had not spoken in years and even though I had a lot of anger towards her, all I really wanted was her love and approval.
I am sad to say that we wasted so many years, but beyond happy to tell you that we finally have what is shaping up to be a 'normal' relationship. At 41, and a month away from becoming a grandmother, I have my own mother in my life.
As for my step mother...I doubt if she even knows that Kayla is expecting. Oh, who am I kidding? Everyone has facebook and she has probably heard the news. I have not heard from her, though, and honestly? I am good with that. Sometimes you have to slough off the crap, and that is what I am doing.
It's not about anger anymore. I just don't see what she or any of the others from that side of the 'family' have to offer to my kids, or my grandson for that matter.
I only want positive people in Landon's life, so I guess that leaves Mission Mary out in the cold.

My sister in law was here last month and I think that she may have seen a little bit of the 'real' me. I can hide my crazy ass ways when people only see me at family gatherings, or for small periods of time. My SIL actually spent two nights here. Gah.
I love her so much and she is just about the sweetest person that I know. We have silly fun days out at the second hand stores or just hanging at the house. I mean, she is awesome.
And I was stressed beyond the max. I sleep schedules are all screwed up, I can barely function like a person should - cooking, cleaning, all of that - and I am a big moody mess sometimes. I hope that her stay wasn't marred by my mental madness.

Jessica will be 16 next month, right about the time that Landon is due. I want to make a big deal out of her sweet sixteen, but the timing could not be worse. You never know with Jess anyway. She may very well prefer a quiet night with her boyfriend to a big party and all of that hoopla.

Speaking of grandmothers and hoopla - it is getting too late for this old lady.
Talk to ya'll soon.


Biddie x