Cha cha cha I'm Back

It has been so long since I have written anything of depth, substance, or anything at all really.
There are many reasons for this lull. I can tell you, and myself that Landon has been occupying my time, or my many pets, my girls, crazy summer adventures, or something of the like are competing for my time. While this is true enough, the real problem isn't any of the above, or in truth, even my lack of a computer in our house. The real,honest to goodness truth is that my own brain is sabatoging me. I am very much medicated, see my shrink, and do what I can to ease the stress of my broken mond.
It just doesn't make a lick of difference.
I can not control my racing thoughts, the craziness that seems to not only follow me, but actually embraces me and threatens to strangle me in its hold.
There seems to be no escaping the madness that follows my every move, my every thought, my every breath. I don't know HOW to find my way out of this.
Not even writing is enjoyable or theraputic for me anymore. Most days I can barely put thoughts into real, full sentences, never mind find a way out of this dark hole that is hovering above me, waiting to swallow me.
I am lost, and wandering. My only hope is that something or someone finds me before it is too late.

Happy Father's Day to all of the wonderful Dad's out there.
   Special thoughts to all of you that have lost a Dad....

Just For Laughs

I am actually looking forward to Mother's Day this year. Not only is my daughter a new mom, I am a new Nana and I am speaking to my own Mum again after an 8 year estrangement. It still doesn't feel real sometimes - the Nana part, having a relationship with my Mum, having a daughter that is a mother. I guess that it is still sinking in.

I hope that all Mom's feel like this on Sunday and everyday.

Proof

that I can bake and survive. Yes, I made these on my own, and they are 100% home made by me.

Oh, and they were incredible, if I do say so myself :)

EASTER!!!

Here it is rhe eve before Easter morning and I still have baking to do, side dishes to plan, and floors to mop - after all, Landon will be here!
  
   Happy Easter, Everyone!

Finally, The photos

Our trip to Toronto was fabu. I have been meaning to download pics for a couple of weeks now, but a lost camera cord and spring cleaninghad me somewhat sidetracked.

We met so many wonderful people! Nicholas Brendan was not just sincere and sweet, but he was crazy ass funny. He blamed it on his medication for a throat infection, but we got the feeling that this was the real Nic. We learned many interesting things in the Q & A sesssion with him.

 For instance, did you know that the age of consent in Spain is 13?

 Also, he has a dog named Steven. Not Steve, Steven.

 Alot of his character on Buffy was just him. It was more casting then acting. Another thing that both KC and I learned that we are by far NOT the biggest geeks out there. Convention or not, I can't imagine an adult dressing as an Avatar character - we are talking full body blue make up - or a Steam Punk with all of the regalia.

 Oh, and another thing? Storm Troopers STILL freak me out.

Dustin Diamond was a very pleasant surprise! He was great. He was not the douche bag that most people think he is. He hugged us, told us some juicy inside bits about Saved By The Bell, and was just a nice guy. I really dig him.

Here we are at Dundas Square. If there is a protest, an impromtu concert, some sort of live action show, you will find it here. This was Elvis, I think, but he was blasting Johnny Cash songs. Whatever. He was awesome. He was there for at aleast two days in a row.

I was also offered a free bag of limes (courtesy of The City Of Toronto), which I declined, but later regretted,. KC bought a mini Butter Finger for 27 cents,for some cause or other.

 This was the breath taking view from our 22nd floor hotel room. You can see the water, but most of the view was a construction site that was closed down for the weekend. Still, the water quiets my soul, and gives me a feeling of peace....I was quite happy there.

This is one of my favourite photos. KC and Claire Kramer. You may know her as Courtney from Bring It On, or Glory from Buffy.
 She is one the one the highlights of our trip.
   We had to wait in line to see her, and the man in front of us was special needs. He took up about 15 minutes of her time, taking pic after pic, gifting her with Avon jewelry, and repeating the same thing - again and again. She not only took the time to to actually listen to this guy, she posed, happily, for about 20 different photos. She was so patient and kind that I not only immeadiately liked her. I respected her for her treatment of a man that most people would have ignored or dealt with quickly.
   She rocked.


 Honestly? That trip wiped my ass out. We got home late Sunday night and I spent most of Monday sleeping. It was my first big expedition since I got sick, and I realized that everything must be done in moderation. (Not a word that is normally in my vocabulary). I need to get out more, exercise, be active, but this was like a whirl wind of activity.

  Hopefully I will be more prepared for our next trip. It will warmer by then, and Dundas Square will be a hive of activity. I can only imagine what is in store for us...

Whisked Away

Last weekend my eldest daughter and I boarded the Greyhound and took a mini vacation to the big city of Toronto. We spent two nights at a 4 Star hotel on the 22nd floor.



KC and I rubbed elbows with celebrities and spent some quality time window shopping.I can't resist The Disney Store, and now I have a little one to buy for. I am so looking forward to the day that I can take Landon shopping there with me.



This week is all about spring cleaning. We have cleared about 6 garbage bags and at least as many boxes out of the basement. It's a big freaking deal for me, cuz, although I am not a hoarder, I really could be. I hang on to things, to compensate, I suppose, for all of the loss in my life. That's what Dr. Phil would say anyway.


Life is the old boring thing otherwise, I am waiting for my next two nights away in June when KC head back to the big city to see New Kids On The Block and The Backstreet Boys. It's all good, you can laugh if you want, but I am counting the days!

Tired. Tired of being walked on, used, and then being pushed aside when I can't do something 'useful.'

  Tired and just plain done with the bullshit.

RETIRED HUSBAND




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After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target.



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Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.



Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.



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Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target:



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Dear Mrs. Harris,



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Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our? store.



We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store.



Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:



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1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.



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2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.



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3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.



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4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'.



This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn



resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.



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5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.



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6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.



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7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers



he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding



department to which twenty children obliged.



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8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed,



'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.



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9.. September 4 : Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.



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10. September 10 : While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.



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11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.



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12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his ' Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.



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13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'



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14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'



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And last, but not least:



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15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

Family Friday :Birthdays, Baby, and Cakes

Still here, just having computer problems.

 Going to go catch up with everyone right now.

click here to see what the doctor said

Scared

If you have medical tests done and the doctor won't give you the results over the phone, does that mean that it is bad news???
 

Family Friday - Week Four - Lola and Bruno Turn TWO

Lola and Bruno are TWO! Can you believe it?

  As you can see, Bruno is a pretty relaxed guy. Here he is just chillin on the sofa with Raj, our kitten.

Lola. on the other hand, is living large in her fancy glasses.


  I know that some people don't think of their pets as part of the family, but in our house, they are very much family. I would be lost without my bad little pups.

Happy Birthday to Lola, Molly Bella, Darby, Mia, and Bruno.

Landon is 2 Months Old

I am still in awe of this silly, smilely, laughing little boy.
   Love :)

Family Friday Week 3 Brotherly Love

Steve and Biddie.
  June 1970.

Go Ahead, Make My Day

I had an appointment with my doctor today and I met a very sweet girl in the waiting room.

 She thought that I was 26 and I was (obviously) way too young to be a grandma.

 Also, she liked my hair, which I not only washed but also brushed today.


Hey, it's my story and I can tell it the way that I want to :)

Ch-Changes

Life can be strange.

Just when you think things are one way, something happens to pull the rug out from under you.

KC has moved out again and I am no longer considered eligible for disability.

 Ain't that a kicker?





I have sent out some invites to a new blog. If I missed you on the invitation list, let me know and I will make sure that you can visit me at my new place. I will sort things out there. (Click on the post title to be redircted if you are singed in)

Family Friday - Week Two

This lovely lady with the big smile is my grandmother, who will be 90 in 2 short months. She travelled to Kayla's baby shower all the way from the Windsor area to be at the shower.

 I think it is amazing that I, as a granmother, still have MY grandmother. How lucky am I?

You have to wonder about someone that is so obsessed with another person that they just can not let them go. Someone that is so hung up on an ex that they must follow that person's every move, find ways to insert themselves into the lives of the very person (people) that they profess to detest.

 I have one of these followers. He is (in my opinion) insane. Ok, maybe not clinically insane, but off kilter at the very least.

   All I can  hope is that this nut bar finds a new hobby, or better yet, he is finally called out for his bizarre and malicious behaviour.

  Your time is coming, Goof Boots.

 

I am still working on my relationship with my Mum, and most days I feel as though we are communicating the way that I have always wanted to. It has been a long time since we have spent any real time together and it has been more than 20 years since I have I gone back to Nova Scotia, the place that I consider to be my home.

   I may regret this, and I may change my mind, heck, I may not be able to afford it, but my plan is to see the ocean this summer.

  Yup, watch out Halifax, here I come!

My Laughing Boy

This is what/who gets me up everyday. My Kayla, and my laughing boy. I am going through some stuff that is reallly affecting my mental healthand I don't know how to cope. I long talk with my Mum helped, a bit. An email from my brother may have helped to clear things up, but closer to home, things are for the birds.

I don't know what I am going to do to make things better. I don't know how I will cope.

  I will be around.......

Introducing

..............Family Friday.

Ok, maybe the name is lame, but I like the concept. Fridays will be all about family and this week I am starting with

Landon Matthew, of course. This is one of my new favourite photos of him. He is snuggled in his Mommy's baby blanket, which belonged to KC first. This blanket has been loved.

This photo takes me back 20 years to when his momma was just about this size.

So there you have Family Friday Week One:

Landon and the baby blanket.

I think that I am going to like Fridays :)

Worst motel EVER.