Life Or Something Like It

I am so far behind with everything. I haven't really posted in along time - or so it seems.
I started my new meds last week. YAY ME! The shrink has me on Wellbutrin, and my old stand by, Seroquel. I have been on that before, and it works well for me. It is a very low dose, though, and I think that for it to work at all, I need a higher dose.
I can't really say that I feel better, because it takes a few weeks to kick start my brain. I am frustrated as all hell with my shrink. It was my first visit in MONTHS, and I had all of maybe 7 minutes. How can I tell him what I need to in 7 freaking minutes? Whatever happened to the days that we had a 50 minute hour? I know that he doesn't need to hear every detail of my life, but I thought that he might like to know that I have had several severe depressive episodes. My next appointment isn't until June. Somebody should remind me, because I am bound to forget by then.

Shawn has declared this LOVE WEEK. He is freaking me out, he has been so sweet. He has been talking about getting married again, too. We never seem to get past the talking stage. Not that I don't wanna marry him and make it all legal like. This is the longest relationship that I have ever had. Usually I am in divorce court by now. We haven't even made it to the church.
Part of the reason is the whole tax situation. We (read HE) needs to get it sorted out. The other reason is that we can not agree on anything. I don't want a big wedding. Cripes, I have been married twice already. I just want my kids there, my most important family members and a nice dress. He wants BIG. If we invite his family (that hate me) it will be big. Seven sisters, one brother, assorted spouses, kids, and grandkids of his siblings. (He is the baby. His oldest sister is about the age of my mom(s) . He actually grew up thinking that it was his aunt).

Here's the other thing. He is nuts. Ok, like I am crazy and stuff, but he is over the top insane. He told me last night that he wants a duck as the ring bearer.

No, really. I can't even tell you what he wants to wear. There is no such thing as low key when you are hanging with Shawn.

Sigh.

My biggest heartbreak this month is that I am NOT going to see The Spice Girls. I wanted to take the girls to see them in T.O. I was checking out tickets on ebay today...$1000 for two. There is just no way possible.

I wonder HOW I am going to Spice Up My Life now?

Sigh.