Happy Birthday, Kayla

Today is February 27th. Today my 2nd born turns 16. I know that everyone thinks that their kid is special. Everyone thinks that their kid is wonderful, and one of a kind. I don't think so. I know so.

Kayla was born in 1991, a little more than a year after the loss of my son. Unlike her sister 3 years earlier, Kayla was not a surprise. We planned for her. I didn't even wait the 3 months that the doctor suggested that we wait. I couldn't. I knew that this amazing little person was just around the corner.
I was 21, and stuck in a bad marriage. I thought that a new baby, a son would help. I wasn't expecting Kayla to save our relationship. I thought that Rudi would realize how much he loved his little family and straighten up. I was wrong.
I was sure that Kayla would be a boy. So sure, in fact, that I bought everything in blue and green. The walls of the nursery were painted blue, the curtains were blue, the blankets, sleepers, and stuffed toys were all blue. I even bought a blue crib. About a week before she was born, I had an epiphany. The baby that I was carrying, the child that I was already calling Kyle, was a girl.
Rudi hit the roof when I told him. He must've thought that it was some conspiracy to drive him crazy. It wasn't. It was just a wonderful side effect.
Kayla slept through the night for the 1st time when she was 3 weeks old. I thought that those first 3 weeks were the longest of my life. I had to run the vacuum at all hours to calm her. The neighbours must've thought that I was crazy.
I was.

Crazy for the brown haired, wide eyed little girl that was the spitting image of me. Friends called her Midget Bridget. She really was. She had my attitude and my looks. Poor kid.
When we baptized Kayla, we gave her 2 sets of God parents. I knew that a kid like Kayla needed special spiritual guidance that Rudi's sister could never provide. Rudi's sister and husband were God parents out of guilt. Heidi and Jethro were made God parents out of love, and it is a decision that I have never regretted.
Kayla was always the brave one. I remember a 3 year old Kayla heading out the door to fight an 8 year old bully that had smacked KC around. Kayla was having none of that. She rolled up her sleeves and snuck out the back door while I was cleaning KC's cuts. My 3 year old Kayla sent the 8 year old bully home in tears.
Once, when she was 4, she caught a chipmunk. With her bare hands. That's how we learned that chipmunks don't carry rabies.
When she was in grade 7, she got a one day suspension from school because she kicked her shoe off at a girl. She was pissed because the shoe missed the other girl by a mile, but she still got suspended. She truly felt that if she had to do the time, she should get to REALLY do the crime. She wanted a re do.
I sent her to Shawn's parents for the day, because I was still in school. His parents were supposed to make her work in the garden and teach her a lesson about respecting her fellow classmates.
Grandpa took her fishing and then out for ice cream.

That'll teach her.
I guess that you could say that she mellowed in her old age. She will walk away from a fight- unless someone is threatening her little sister. Kayla took down a 200 lb girl because the girl threw a punch at J. Kayla told me that she just twisted the girls arm until she screamed and promised to leave J alone. It was about the same time that she heard a snap. Kayla weighs about 95 lbs soaking wet. This girl, a bully that had been bothering Kayla for months, crosses the street now when she sees Kayla. I don't condone or approve of violence, but sometimes you have to stand up for your self.
Kayla will stand up to God Himself. Then she will tell Him why He is wrong and she is right.
Those that know us well, Kayla and I, say that we are 2 peas in a pod.
I couldn't agree more.
And, I couldn't be more proud.
Happy Birthday, Kayla.

Introducing Lint Brush

This is Lint Brush, or LB for short. He is one of Henry's babies and I just HAD to introduce him to you. I'm not sure why, but he has a bald spot. See it? It cracks me up.
In other news, I have come to an agreement with my (2nd) x husband regarding child support. He is paying less than what the guidlines say that he should, and he hasn't been paying for any of J's extra's. He has a great benefit package, but other than her Rx's, he hasn't helped with anything. Even with his benefits, which cover up to 80% of the fees, I still pay about $120 a month for J's diabetic supplies. If we went to court, I would be awarded an extra $80 a month, plus I would be entitled to more to help with the cost of medical supplies. I don't want to fight, though. I will have a tough road ahead with Rudi, and I can only manage so much crap at once. I proposed this. X #2 (we call him Goof), will pay the same amount of support that he has been. He will pay for the deductible on her eyeglasses, and he will pay the cost up front. He will pay the deductible for the dentist, and he will pay it up front. If the deductible is less than the 80%, then we will split the cost. He will also buy her a box of needle tips every other month. He is still beating around the bush when it comes to her braces. She needs them and neither one of us has any coverage. I won't pay for them alone, it just isn't happening. Anyway, we got a lot settled, and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of me..
I did this.
ME.
I did this all alone.
Now, I just have to deal with Rudi.
The thing that gets me about Goof is this. He hasn't seen his daughter in about 2 years. Her birthday, and Christmas passed without a word from him. When we spoke on the phone, he didn't ask about any of the girls. Not once.
I don't get it.
I have gotten a few ideas for my next blog. Tod wants to know the worst advice that I ever got. Dilling wants to hear more about highschool with Heidi. I believe that Ldbug and Gardenia mentioned something about cheese..Heidi asked about the dog and TMOC...I still have lots to think about. I think that I'll ponder it tonight and get back to you.
Night.

I got nothin'. Any suggestions?

I 've been thinking alot lately, about honesty, and stealing, and perspective. I can't get the Great Cheese Caper out of my mind. I lay awake at night thinking about it. I think about it in the shower, doing laundry, making dinner, it's all I can think of. I guess that I'm confused. I made a mistake on January 26th. A big one, but a mistake none the less. I will probably be punished for this by losing my PSW license, a fine, and probation. Here's what confuses me.
My sister, Posh, works for a large company and makes about $250,000 a year. She travels, all over the world, and has a pretty good gig. She steals from her work place on a regular basis. She gave KC a memory stick for the computer, emblazened with the name of her work place. KC tells me that these are worth up to $100. Posh spends that on coffee every week. $100 is a drop in a very large bucket for her.
Here's what confuses me. If Posh knew about my arrest, she would cluck her tongue and lecture me about honesty and being accountable for my actions. She would. She prides herself on her honesty and considers stealing to be a sin. (I guess that it is, if you know your commandments). So...I'm a theif, and she isn't?
I guess that it's all in the perspective. People 'borrow' from there workplaces all of the time. Hubby tells me about co workers that have redone whole rooms in their houses with materials taken from the job site. When I worked at the grocery store (same chain that is charging me), coworkers punched in early and punched out late on their time cards. Is this theft? How many times have we taken pens, office supplies, whatever, from work? Who among us is NOT guilty?
I will go to court on April 3rd to be judged for my transgressions....I DID put the items in my cart. I AM guilty of that. I did not mean to leave without paying.
I wonder who the judge will be? I wonder what his/her perspective will be on this issue. Will he/she be understanding, or will he/she also want to make an example of me?
I wonder if the judge will also be a 'borrower' and will see things as they are? I wonder if when the judge signs his/her name on the documents before her, it will be a pen 'borrowed' from someone else.
I wonder.

Updates, Rants, and Headclogging Crap

Henry and the babies are doing well. The little ones are 2 weeks old now, and have become tiny hopping furballs. They are all living together again, and Henry is feeding them on their own. I took a photo of "Skippybunny" in mid hop. Isn't she just the cutest? KC named her that because Skippy is promising to drive down in a few months and get her.

I go to get finger printed on March 16th. I have an appointment, just like going to see your family doctor. I go to court on April 3rd. I am seriously considering just pleading guilty to stealing the fricking cheese. If it goes to trial, it could drag on for months. I think that the worst I will get is probation anyway, maybe a fine. Maybe, the judge will look at the whole thing and throw it out. Maybe. I can hope, can't I? I just don't want this thing dragging on into the end of May. TMOC is getting married then, and Lucky is coming up from Colorado. She is planning on flying in to Toronto, and then renting a van so that we can all go together. It's the only way that I'll be able to go. It's more than just the wedding though. See, my kids have never met her kids, and I have never met them, either. Lucky and I have only ever had about 2 days to visit, and I miss her terribly. My neice and KC are both 19 now, and we don't know how often we'll have a chance like this again. KK and my nephew are super close, and they are positively DYING to finally meet. I just want to see my sister. I want Heidi to meet my sister, and want to create some real family memories, not just emails or long phone conversations. I want a photo of all of cousins together, a photo of Lucky, TMOC and me.

Shawn is back to work today. He's with a new company now, and will be making about $10 less an hour. Ouch. We weren't exactly rolling in dough before, but it sure beats the big fat $0 that he has been making. He hasn't been fulltime since before Christmas, and we are dangerously behind on bills. Besides, he HATES doing nothing, not working everyday. I am just happy that he is back to doing what he loves. A happy Shawn makes for a happy house.

Do you remember KC telling you about the cabbie that assaulted her and tried to steal my cell phone from her? It happened on the day that Shawn went to pay the ginormous gas bill, December 8th. Well, we heard back from the detective in charge of the case, and the cabbie is being charged with assault and robbery. Neither KC nor Shawn have to testify, but Shawn has opted to give a victim impact statement. I can't wait for this! The trial starts on April 13th, and I plan on being there. We are finally being taken seriously, and more importantly, this creep won't get the chance to terrorize another person again. At the very least, he will lose his taxi lisence, even though he is the owner of the car.

We got dumped on again on the 14th. More snow. It is so deep that Porky won't even leave the front porch, and Ruby won't go out. At all. Unless she thinks the Pug might be out there. Hey, I do what I have to, ok? I almost had a stroke when I went out shovelling with KK last night. I would've been pissed if I would've missed Supernatural and ER because of a stupid stroke. I almost cut my baby toe off once, and it was during ER. I didn't want to go to the hospital until it was over. My x made me go right away, and of course I missed Dr. Carter and what'shername getting attacked by the crazy knife weilding patient. Never again, I tell you. I'm planning my accidents better now.

Anyway, KK has finally emerged from her room. It must be close to feeding time. Gotta run, motherhood calls.

Later.

Love Is....................................

A Cornicopia Of Awesomeness

Today our package arrived from Lucky. I felt like a little kid at Christmas! Inside was all manner of randomosity, including, paper cups from Starbucks, Luckys' fav mac and cheese, sea monkeys for J, 2 ipods, family photos, keychains hand made by The Nephew, dry soup, microwave popcorn......The list is endless!

I think this is my favourite gift of all. Can you read what it says? It says RECLAIM YOUR SENSUALITY. Reclaim? I didn't know that I ever lost it. Shawn is so excited. It's like spanish fly for grown ups. I don't know if this was a gift for him, or for me!

Among Shawn's fav gift was the Useless Information Quiz book. I love it! There are about 10 hand-me-down sweaters and t shirts for KK and J. And jewelry. And shot glasses. Post its, candles, and telephone, Grateful Dead stickers.......I swear, she put in one of almost everything.

How cool is my sister? I haven't seen her in about 3 yrs. We're hoping to get together for TMOC's wedding. I can't wait.

Anyway, I am off now. Since Hubby is laid off right now, we might as well make use of some of this time to try and reclaim our sensuality. Maybe. I'm thinking about it. We'll see what happens....

Is It Mother's Day Already?

I had the surprise of my life yesterday. Hubby got laid off, again, and his paycheck wasn't enough to cover our bills, groceries, or rent. I didn't tell KC how much the cheque was for, just that Shawn was laid off, looking for new work, and that money would be extra tight for the next couple of weeks. KC went to the grocery store to pick up some munchies because she was having her insignificant other over to watch movies. I called her on her cell phone and asked her to pick up toilet paper for me.
She came home about an hour later with $120 worth of groceries. That is the equivelent of a weeks pay for her. You could have knocked me over with a feather. My almost 19 year old bought food for the family. With her own money. Without being asked. Without complaining.
I am speechless. ME. Speechless.

Ruby and The Babies......

The baby bunnies are living in the old bird cage for now. Ruby is just dying to get to them, as you can see from this photo.....

It seems I spoke too soon when I said that Henry was a good mom. This is a photo of KK feeding the black bunny, the one that she calls Spazz. We lost a bunny, too. The smallest one didn't make it. We still have 3 baby bunnies that we are now hand feeding. They are walking around now, trying to hop. We have about a month of "bottle" feedings until they're able to eat on their own. I am so excited. Can't you tell?

For My Little Buddy In Virginia - Baby Bunnies!

Just a quick post today. I am feeling a little better, at least I got dressed today. Trust me, that's big.
We had a new addition to the family last Thursday. Actually, 4 new additions. I thought that we had the bunny situation worked out. You know, the boys in one place and the girls in another. Yeah, well, I was wrong. This is what we found Thursday evening. Four tiny babies. They are still bald, and their eyes haven't opened yet. That'll happen when they hit about 10 days old. They babies are about 3 days old here. The mom doesn't mind if you handle them, and many times we have had to bottle feed new born bunnies. Not this time. Henry, the mommy, is doing a great job.
Anyway, that's about the most exciting thing that has happened around here. Unless you count the huge amount of snow that we got, and the unbelievable temerature of -30. Ruby won't even go out to do her thing. Porky runs on to the porch, and right back in. I haven't been out since grocery shopping, and if I can work out, I won't be leaving the house again until the spring thaw.

I am still sick. Strep throat. Not fun. Not much to say, either, except thanks for stopping by.