Thursday, January 14, 2010

I Think I Can

You know that feeling that you get in the pit of your stomache when something - anything - has you so beyond stressed that it is all that you can think of? That queasy, icky, feeling of dread that you get right before a big test, or a trip to the boss's (principal's) office?
Yup. I got it, and I can't shake it.
Something big is going down, alright, but it is something that I have zero amount of control over. So why do I obsess so much?
If I knew the answer to this than I would probably be working full time, I would sleep peacefully without a slew of doctor presrcibed happy pills. I could breathe deeply and step onto the bus alone, without my ipod, without coming up with some sort of escape plan in my head.
I wish that these simple actions were just that for me - simple - but every move that I make outside of these four walls must be carefully planned.
Where was I going with all of this? I have a thing tomorrow, and I am scared sh*tless. I HAVE to this, there is no choice.
I am going to put on my ipod, take some crazy pills, and lean very heavily on my support system - Shawn and Lynn.
I can do this.
I can.

16 comments:

Stinkypaw said...

Of course you can, you WILL! Hang in there, you'll get thru this.

Biddie said...

Thanks :)

Biddie said...

Can't find my darn ipod...Ack..

Gabriel said...

You'll be OK, Biddie. As you said, you have a great support system! It's a little bigger than what you think, though... :-)

Biddie said...

Thanks, Gabriel. You rock!

aims said...

Once you get through this - you're going to be amazed at how well you did. Believe me.

You're strong. Remember that.

Four Dinners said...

Go girl!!!! Be strong!!!!! You CAN do it.

er...whatever it is....;-)

Biddie said...

Aims - I am trying to remember that..I am strong, just scared outta my mind.
Thanks for the kind words :)

4D - Thank you! I will have Shawn with me, so I should be ok...still don't wanna do it though...

Anonymous said...

Whatever it is, you can do this. I know it!

Maggie Mae

Biddie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Biddie said...

Oops, I meant to say that it was ok..I survived. Panic city, heart pounding, sweaty palms, but I survived it!

Anonymous said...

Whoo hoo! Glad to hear that you made it!

Gabriel said...

Oh, yeah. :-)

Searching1 said...

Hope everything is going ok! <3
Best wishes to you!

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