The Voices In My Head

I have SO much crap in my head. The voices in my head just won't quiet down, and I think that the only way to quell them is to blog about it all.
Christmas was awesome. We made do with less, and somehow it didn't matter. We were together, and warm, and enjoyed each others company. What did put a damper on our celebrations however, was a conversation with my brother, that upset the whole family and left KC and I in tears. I love my brother in a way that most people don't understand. There has been much upheaval and craziness in our lives, and through it all, we have been always been there for each other. TMOC is 4 years than I am, but it seems that I have been the one looking out for him. I have forgiven him for things that I would never even dream of forgiving anyone else for doing/saying. He has probably done the same for me. I don't know where our relationship stands now. I fear that I may have lost him. This pains me.
Hubby is still laid off. He went back to work for ONE day, and has been laid off ever since. I dealt with the Christmas issue just fine - we can all live with less stuff - but I am seriously sweating about the little stuff. You know - electricity, heat, phone..... I'm trying to stay positive about this, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it all works out. Soon.
Gas. Those ass-hats are at it again. I really thought that we had it all taken care of. I mean, we JUST paid $3300 to pay off ALL accounts, past present, and even the imaginary ones. Last week I got a bill saying that we owed $110 in ARREARS. Guess what? They had NO record of Hubby paying $ 3300 just 2 weeks earlier. SIGH. I am so mad. I don't even think that I can deal with this. Hubby will have to make this phone call. Deep breaths.
Speaking of Hubby, he needs glasses. The truth is, we can't afford them right now, but I don't think that he will even admit to needing them. I'll give you a few examples. We were watching Superman Returns last week. I need the captioning because I am practically deaf. (Seriously, I have a hearing loss in both ears). Hubby can't read the captioning, because he is nearly blind. The captioning says...' i'm glad that you're feeling better.' What does Hubby read?
I'm glad that I'm feeding you butter.
One day when we were out for a walk on garbage day, we walked past an old coffee maker sitting on the curb. Hubby wanted to know what was wrong the good looking pair of boots that someone would throw them out? He wanted to try them on.
Then there was the day that he was nearly arrested for following a woman around the bus terminal, trying to feed her french fries. As it turns out, he thought that it was me, and he was shoving food in some woman's face. Then there was the time that some poor guy thought that he was being car jacked when Hubby came storming over to his truck and tried to open the door. He thought that it was his boss's truck, and he was trying to pick up his pay check.
SIGH.
Tomorrow Hubby, KC and I go to the police station. Hubby and KC were assaulted by a cab driver, and the cops might be pressing charges. Even though I am going into police station through the front doors, sans handcuffs, it still kinda freaks me out. My expirience with the justice system has been less than satisfactory recently. I am hoping that since it is the police that are pursuing this, it will all work out in the end.
Grandma comes over tomorrow, too. We haven't seen her in a couple of weeks, because she was in BC visiting with her other grandkids. The girls are itching to get at their gifts, and I think that they may have missed Grandma just a wee little bit, too. This means that Hubby will be making some homemade pie in honour of her visit. There's nothing better than Grandma and home made pie.
Maybe having Grandma for a visit will help Ruby forget about the Pug. For a little while, anyway.