We went to Jessica's appointment today. It did not go as well as I wanted. In fact, it was worse that I ever could have imagined.
Jessica has lost 11 pounds off of her tiny frame, bringing her weight to a whopping 89 pounds. She is so underweight. She is losing her hair, and her kidneys are failing.
How did I not notice?
Good question. I knew that she had lost weight. I knew that her blood sugars were running higher than they should. I did NOT know that her monitor was off by 25%, and that she was giving herself too much insulin. We have the monitor checked every time she sees her doctor.
I lost it. I was crying my eyes out before I even knew how sick she was.
My thoughts are everywhere right now. I don't even know if I am making sense. All I know is that Jessica is in the hospital, and she will be there for a week, maybe more. I don't know what else is happening. I'll know more tomorrow when I go back.
I feel like the world's worst mom right now. My baby is at the hospital, facing God knows what.
I'll let you know when I know more.